A Preacher's Sermon

A preacher phoned the city's newspaper. "Thank you very much," said he, "for the error you made when you announced my sermon topic for last Sunday. The topic I sent you was 'What Jesus Saw in A Publican.' You printed it as 'What Jesus Saw in a Republican' I had the biggest crowd of the year!"

Fish That Priests' Eat

Q: What kind of fish does a priest eat?
A: Nun!

Lord's Prayer Deal

The pope was weighting in line at Mc Donald's for lunch. When the manager came out to have a word. The manager told the pope that McDonald's would give 5 Million dollars to the church if he some how changed the Lord's prayer to give us today our daily hamburger instead of give us today our daily bread. The pope thought for a moment then said sorry I really can't. The manager then said, "Okay how about 40 million?" The pope said, "Okay well I'll talk to my top Cardinal about it." So the pope goes and sees the Cardinal and says, "I've got some good news and some bad news." The Cardinal says well lets hear the good news first. The Pope then says, "I can get the us 40 million dollars to put a church were ever they want." "The bad news is we are going to have to break the deal with Brumbies."