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Relationship Jokes - Cheater Jokes
Clinton Surprise
Hillary Clinton goes in for her annual gynecological exam. The doctor tells her she's pregnant. Hillary realizes this will eliminate her chance to run for president and storms out of the office to call Bill. "You got me pregnant! How could you be so careless?" After a moment of stunned silence, Bill says, "Who is this?"
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The Cat And The Milkman
Little Lucy went out into the garden and saw her cat Tiddles lying on the ground with its eyes shut and its legs in the air. She fetched her Dad to look at Tiddles, and on seeing the cat he said, as gently as he could, "I'm afraid Tiddles is dead, Lucy". "So why are his legs sticking up in the air like that, Daddy?" asked Lucy as she fought back the tears. At a loss for something to say the father replied, "Tiddles' legs are pointing straight up in the air so that it will be easier for Jesus to float down from heaven above and grab a leg and lift Tiddles up to heaven". Little Lucy seemed to take her Tiddles death quite well. However, two days later when her father came home from work Lucy had tears in her eyes and said: "Mommy almost died this morning". Fearing something terrible had happened the father shook the girl and shouted, "How do you mean Lucy? Tell Daddy!" "Well", mumbled Lucy, "soon after you left for work this morning I saw mommy lying on the floor with her legs in the air and she was shouting, "Oh Jesus! I'm coming, I'm coming!" and if it hadn't been for the milkman holding her down she would definitely have gone, Daddy".
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Blonde Cheating Test
A blonde wife wanted to know how her husband would react if she ran-out on him. She wrote a note saying how she was tired of their marriage and wasn't going to put up with him anymore. She left the note on the kitchen table and hid under the bed when she heard her husband open the garage.
Her husband came into the kitchen, saw the note and then wrote something on it. Immediately he started dancing and singing while changing into another pair of pants. He then called someone on his cell phone and said, "Hey babe the idiot finally had enough of me, she's gone, gone gone! I'll be over in 10 minutes! He then rushed out and drove off.
The blonde wife comes out from under the bed with tears in her eyes and reads what her husband wrote on the note. "I can see your feet sticking out from under the bed. I've gone to buy some beer."
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