Code of Honor

A Code of Honor: Never approach a friend's girlfriend or wife with mischief as your goal. There are just too many women in the world to justify that sort of dishonorable behavior. Unless she's really attractive.

Dead Mailman

A couple drives to the hospital, as the wife is in labor. The doctor alerts them that she invented a machine that will transfer some of the labor pain to the father, if they'd like. The husband eagerly says, "Give it all to me!" The couple returns home with a bouncing baby boy, only to find the mailman dead on their lawn.

Solo Quest

Q: Why was Han Solo suspicious when he put his penis inside Princess Leia for the first time?
A: It was Luke warm.