Leave IT at Work

Husband writes code.
Wife : Honey, please go to the super market and get 1 bottle of milk. If they have bananas, bring 6.
He came back with 6 bottles of milk.
Wife: Why the hell did you buy 6 bottles of milk?!?!
Husband (confused): BECAUSE THEY HAD BANANAS.
He still doesn't understand why his wife yelled at him since he did exactly as she told him.

Thanksgiving Story

A young boy after hearing the story of Thanksgiving and how the Indians and the Pilgrims sat down together, climbed up into his father's lap and said, "Daddy, did you know that if we were Indians, you would be a brave and Mom would be a squawk?" "That is the best description of your mother I have ever heard!" replied his daddy as he ducked.

Girlfriend Yells During Sex

I was having sex with my girlfriend the other day and she kept yelling some other guy's name.  Who the heck is Rape?