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Relationship Jokes
How To Get Rid Of Roaches
Q: How does the single woman get rid of roaches?
A: She asks them for a commitment.
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Mr. Schneider in Court.
Mr. Schneider stood up in court. "As God is my judge, I do not owe my ex-wife any money". Glaring down at him, the judge replied, "He's not. I am. You do."
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Still Got It
An eighty-year-old man goes to a doctor for a check-up. The doctor tells him, “You’re in terrific shape. I think you might live forever. How old was your father when he died?” The eighty-year-old says, “Did I say he was dead?” The doctor is shocked. He asks, “Well, how old was your grandfather when he died?” The eighty-year-old responds again, “Did I say he was dead?” The doctor is astonished. He says, “You mean to tell me you are eighty years old and both your father and your grandfather are alive?” “Not only that,” says the old man, “my grandfather is 122 years old, and next week he is getting married for the first time.” The doctor says: “After 122 years of being a bachelor, why on earth does your grandfather want to get married?” The old man looks up at the doctor and says, “Did I say he wanted to?”
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