Female Comebacks

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
 
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
 
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
 
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
 
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.
 
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unferrtilized.
 
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
 
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
 
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Hot Babe In The Bar

A hot babe goes into a bar and orders a 'sex on the beach'. She notices a slick dude at the end of the bar with a very prominent feature. "Hi big guy," she says, batting her eyelashes. "Oh hello, beautiful," he says stepping closer to her.
"I couldn't help but notice what big feet you have," as a look of wonderment spreads across her face. "You know what that means..." he coos. "Yes, trouble for the ants," she says.

Ladies Man

The elderly man flattered himself that he was still a ladies? man, and decided to flirt with the beautiful waitress. "So tell me, sweetheart, where have you been all my life?" he crooned. "Actually, sir," she pointed out, "for the first 45 years of it, I wasn't even born yet."