Bumper Stickers

• If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat?
• Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
• A closed mouth gathers no feet.
• A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
• A penny saved is ridiculous.
• All that glitters has a high refractive index.
• Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
• Anarchy is better than no government at all.
• Any small object when dropped will hide under a larger object.
• Death is life's way of telling you you've been fired.

Typeface

Two fonts walk into a bar, the bartender looks up and says, "We don't serve your type here."

Quotes

• Personally, I think that people who say they wish they had their lives to live over again, probably shouldn't anyway.
• Wonder why it is that people who can make fools out of themselves are such excellent craftsmen.
• People who say they've learned from their mistakes should have studied more for the test in the first place.
• As I reflect upon on my past, the thing I regret the most... is its length.
• The way some people find fault with every damn thing in life, you'd think there was a reward.
• Even as I age, I still consider myself a "go-getter"... of course now, I have to make two trips.
• Trust me, when humans were created, I believe there was a very good reason why the body was configured so that ya cannot pat yourself on the back.