Medical Miracles

There's more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040 there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs, huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

50 Years

A man and a woman have just had their 50th wedding anniversary. The husband turns to his wife and asks, "What do you want to do to celebrate our anniversary dear?" She replies, "Let's run upstairs and make love." He turns to her and says, "Well make up your mind, we can't do both!"

The Blind Date

How was your blind date?" a college student asked her roommate. "Terrible! " the roommate answered. "He showed up his 1932 Rolls Royce." " Wow! That's a very expensive car. What's so bad about that?" "He was the original owner!