Like Mother Like Daughter

A man takes his 10 year old daughter to the doctor. He says "Doctor, I want to put her on the pill." The Doctor says "Why?!? Is she sexually active?" The guy says "Nah, she just lies there like her mother."

Exactly My Point

Murphy said to his daughter, "I want you home by eleven o'clock." She said, "But Father, I'm no longer a child!" He said, "I know, that's why I want you home by eleven."

The Government Cut-backs Hit Home

The following conversation took place one morning between a wife and her husband. They were discussing government cost cuts that they recently heard about in the paper. "Steve," his wife said, while reading the newspaper, "it looks like our government is going to cut overhead and trim down the military forces. They are going to eliminate six over-aged destroyers." To which the husband replies, "Sorry to hear that, dear. I'm sure you'll miss your mother being gone."