Things To Do At The Movies

1. Throw popcorn around and yell, "It's snowing!!"

2. Laugh when the good guy dies

3. Start a conversation on your cell phone right when the movie starts

4. Point to the beginning credits and say, "That guy dies."

5. Order pizza halfway through the movie

6. Sit between couples

7. Nonchalantly eat popcorn from other people's containers

8. Announce loudly to everyone in the theater that you are going to the bathroom

9. Bring in your own food such as soup and SLURP loudly.

10. Wear tall hats to block other people's view

11. Walk in as if you are a big shot while wearing the most outrageous outfit; spandex should do the trick.

Unemployed Jester

Q: What do you call an unemployed jester?
A: Nobody's fool.

Blonde Under Deer

Q: What do you call a blonde under a dead deer?

A: All you can eat for under a buck.