Playing Trucker

A young boy sits on the edge of the sidewalk, eats some M&Ms, cuts off the back end of a grasshopper, and then moves down the curb. He does this over and over. His mother asks him what he's doing. He says, "I'm playing trucker. I pop some pills, cut off some a**hole and keep moving."

Wrong Room

One time I accidentally went to the men's washroom instead of the women's. I only found out after I opened a pad and the person in the stall next to me said, "Dude, it must be a massive shit if you're having snacks in here, good luck!

Young Dogs And Headphones

Q: What do you get if cross two young dogs with a pair of headphones?
A: Hush puppies!