AM Winner

My girlfriend and I have a competition every morning to see who gets out of bed first when our alarms go off.
You snooze, you lose.

A Small Donation

Jelani, a half blind 5 year old African orphan has to ride 7 miles a day to school with only one leg on a bicycle with buckled wheels and no brakes. Please give just a small donation of $10...
...and we will send you the video; it's fucking hilarious!

Answering Machine - Take Over The World

You might be calling to give me important information. If so, leave your information at the tone. Or perhaps you just want to have a casual conversation. If so, leave a message and I'll get back to you so we can have the conversation later. Or perhaps you want to know what I'm doing tonight, in which case it's the same thing I do every night. TRYING TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!