Apple iFart

Q: Why shouldn't you fart in an Apple Store?
A: They don't have Windows.

What were they Thinking?

There's a man walking a tight rope 60 feet above ground. There's another man getting a blowjob from a 60 year old woman.
Q: What are they both thinking at the exact same time?
A: Don't look down, don't look down, don't look down, don't look down!

Strategy

Singer Nicki Minaj posted a video of a crying boy who calmed down once he placed his head on her chest. Child rearing experts are calling Minaj a natural and the boy a fucking genius.