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The best jokes and joke writers!

I.R.S. Parking Tickets

The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny.

Boston Globe, April 13, 1990 "Is there justice in this world?"

Well, in Jacksonville, Fla., an Internal Revenue Service car parked outside the federal courthouse was "booted" for unpaid parking tickets, forcing tax collectors to fork over $122.50 to set it free. The IRS had to pay $95 for five tickets, a $25 removal fee plus $2.50 for processing to get the boot taken off, said Gertrude Bradley, clerical supervisor for the city parking division. With the tax-filing deadline closing in, courthouse employees were chuckling about the IRS' misfortune. But the agency was not amused. "We're not pleased with it," said spokesman Holger Euringer. Yeah, we're all really upset.

More Signs and Notices

These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations.

Sign on an asphalt truck: "Let us fill your crack!"

Office sign: "Ace exterminating - we kill bugs dead, walk-ins welcome."

Sign at a muffler shop: "No muff too tough for us!"

Sign on a government issue car: "Fulton county disaster coordinator."

Sign in a Tokyo Hotel: "Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you are not person to do such thing is please not to read notice".

Sign seen on an electricity pylon: DANGER! "To touch these wires will result in instant death. Anyone found doing so will be severely prosecuted."

Sign in a Japanese Hotel room: Please to bathe inside the tub.

Sign in a Leipzig elevator: "Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up."

Telling Some Stories

Delivering a speech at a banquet on the night of his arrival in a large city, a visiting minister told several anecdotes he expected to repeat at meetings the next day. Because he wanted to use the jokes again, he requested the reporters to omit them from any accounts they might turn in to their newspapers. A cub reporter, in commenting on the speech, ended his piece with the following: "The minister told a number of stories that cannot be published." 

Louvre in Dire Straits

Due to the flooding from the Seine River, The Louvre museum in Paris is scrambling to donate French Impressionist and Eastern European artwork to any museum that can keep them dry.

Museums that have agreed to take the artwork are very excited since they're getting Monet for nothing and Czechs for free.

Lunatic Escape Headline

A lunatic seduced the laundry woman to get her keys, and promptly escaped from the asylum.

Next day, the headlines read Nut Screws Washer and Bolts!