Men Packing Lunches

There were three construction workers and each of them always ate the same thing for lunch. 1st worker: "I'm tired of sandwiches it's always sandwich, sandwich, sandwich!" 2nd worker: "I'm sick of tacos! urgh..." 3rd worker: "Ahh how I hate beans! I eat them everyday!" The second day it was the same thing for lunch. 1st worker: "If tomorrow I get sandwiches for lunch I'm going to jump from that bridge and kill myself!" 2nd worker: "One more taco and I'm jumping off that bridge and killing myself!" 3rd worker: "Beans again? If there's beans for lunch tomorrow I'm gonna jump from that bridge and kill myself!" And yes, as always, the next day they had the same thing for lunch. So all of the three men jumped from the bridge and killed themselves. The wives of the men were really sad and were crying for their husbands. 1st wife: "I would've never packed him sandwiches for lunch if I knew he would do that!" 2nd wife: "I would never had packed him tacos if I knew that would happen!" 3rd wife: "I wouldn't pack him beans if I knew that would happen but I don't get why he did that since he packed his own lunch!"
 

Silly Recepie

"This recipe is certainly silly. It says to separate two eggs, but it doesn't say how far to separate them." -- Gracie Allen

Bush and Cheney Ordering

Bush and Cheney are at a restaurant for lunch. The waitress comes over and asks what they will be having. Bush says, "I'll have a quickie." The waitress steps back in disgust and says, "Mr. President, I thought that kind of piggish behavior went out with the last administration!" She storms off and Dubya looks confused. Cheney shakes his head at the president and says, "George, it's pronounced QUICHE."