Looking For A Name

The new mother got out of bed for the first time since her childbirth dressed in her robe and walked down the hospital hallway to the nurses desk where she asked for a phone book. "What are you doing out here! You should be in your room resting," the nurse exclaimed. "I want to search through the phone book for a name for my baby," the new mother replied. "You don't have to do that here. The hospital furnished a booklet to all new mothers to assist them in picking a first name for their baby." "You don't understand," the woman said and frowned. "My baby already has a FIRST name!"

Women Over Fifty...

Q: Do you know why women over fifty don't have babies?
A: They would put them down somewhere and forget where they left them.

Better Parents

Two boys argue over whose parents are better. The first boy says, "My dad's better than your dad." The other boy says, "Well, my mom is better than your mom." The first boy pauses, "I guess you're right. My dad says the same thing."