Old And Overweight

A wife asked her husband, "Honey, will you still love me when I am old and overweight?" The man replied, "Yes, I do."

Young Love

A older couple are driving down the highway when another car passed them. The woman notices the occupants of the other car are young and obviously in love. The girl is sitting very close to her boyfriend as they cruise down the highway. This causes the woman to think back to when she and her husband were young and in love, and wondering where the show of affection had disappeared to over the years. Finally she says to her husband, "Remember when we used to be like that young couple? Where did the love go, honey?" He quietly replied, "I haven't moved...."

Men Advising Women

Advice From Men To Women...

• Never buy a 'new' brand of beer because 'it was on sale.'
• If we're in the backyard and the TV in the den is on, that doesn't mean we're not watching it.
• Don't tell anyone we can't afford a new car. Tell them we don't want one.
• Whenever possible please try to say whatever you have to say during commercials.

Please don't drive when you're not driving.
Don't feel compelled to tell us how all the people in your stories are related to one another: We're just nodding, waiting for the punchline.
The quarterback who just got pummeled isn't trying to be brave. He's just not crying. Big difference!
When the waiter asks if everything's okay, a simple 'Yes' is fine.