Ethnic / Country Jokes - Irish Jokes

Belfast Taxi

An American guy goes to Belfast and the taxi driver at the airport asks him if he's Protestant or Catholic. Guy says he's jewish. The cab driver says, "Oh, I understand." A minute of silence passes and the driver asks, "So are you a Protestant Jew or a Catholic Jew?"

Submitted BY: paraouji

An American and an Irishman

An American and an Irishman were enjoying a ride in the country when they came upon an unusual sight - an old gallows. The American thought he would have a joke on his Irish companion.
"You see that, I reckon," said he to the Irishman, pointing to the gallows. "And now where would you be if the gallows had its due?"
"Riding alone," coolly replied Paddy.

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

The Irish Wedding

A wedding occurred just outside Cavan in Ireland. To keep tradition going, everyone gets extremely drunk and the bride's and groom's families have a storming row and begin wrecking the reception room and generally kicking the shit out of each other. The police get called in to break up the fight. The following week, all members of both families appear in court. The fight continues in the courtroom until the judge finally brings calm with the use of his gavel, shouting, 'Silence in court!' The courtroom goes silent and Paddy, the best man, stands up and says, 'Judge, I was the best man at the wedding and I think I should explain what happened.' The judge agrees and asks Paddy to take the stand. Paddy begins his explanation by telling the court that it is traditional in a Cavan wedding that the best man gets the first dance with the bride. The judge says, "OK.'' "Well",  said Paddy, "after I had finished the first dance, the music kept going, so I continued dancing to the second song, and after that the music kept going and I was dancing to the third song, when all of a sudden the groom leapt over the table, ran towards us and gave the bride an unmerciful kick right between her legs." Shocked, the judge instantly responded, "God, that must have hurt!' "Hurt?"  Paddy replies. "He broke three of my fingers!"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous
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