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Ethnic / Country Jokes - American Jokes
Medical Technology Advances
A group of doctors were at a convention in Switzerland. The topic of discussion was the new medical technology from their countries. "In my country," a German doctor said, "medicine is so advanced, we can perform heart surgery on a person on Monday, and have him back to work in 2 weeks." "That's nothing," a Japanese doctor said. "We can perform an appendectomy on a person on Tuesday, and have him back in work by Saturday."
"That's nothing!" said an American doctor. "We can take an asshole from Arkansas, put him in the White House and half the country is out of work the next day!"
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Measurement of a Pole
An American is walking down the street when he sees a Polack with a very long pole and a yardstick. He's standing the pole on its end and trying to reach the top of it with his yardstick. Seeing the Polack's ignorance, the American wrenches the pole out of his hand, lays it on the sidewalk, measures it with the yardstick, and says, "There! 10 feet long." The Polack grabs the yardstick and shouts, "You idiot American! I don't care how long it is! I want to know how high it is!"
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Ball Point Pen
When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ball-point pens would not work in zero gravity.
To combat this problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion developing a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to over 300° C.
The Russians use a pencil.
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