How Much

A Pollock walks over the Red Light District in Amsterdam when suddenly he notices a fine looking hooker looking at him. He stops, bangs on the window and says, "So, what does this cost?!" The hooker replies "25 dollars!" The Pollock says, "Hmm, that's a pretty good price for insulated windows!"

Polish Hockey Team

Q: Heard about the Polish hockey team?
A: They all drowned in spring training.

Russian War College Class

At the Russian War College, the General is a guest lecturer and tells the class of officers that the session will focus on potential problems and the resulting strategies. One of the officers in the class begins by asking the first question, "Will we have to fight a World War Three?" "Yes, comrades, looks like you will," answers the General. "And who will be our enemy, Comrade General?" another officer asks. "The likelihood is that it will be China." The class looks alarmed, and finally one officer asks, "But Comrade General, we are 150 million people and they are about 1.5 billion. How can we possibly win?" "Well," replies the general, "Think about it. In modern war, it is not the quantity, but the quality that is the key. For example, in the Middle East, 5 million Jews fight against 50 million Arabs, and the Jews have been the winners every time." "But sir," asks the panicky officer, "Do we have enough Jews?"