A Happy Marriage

The most happy marriage I can imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. -- S. T. Coleridge

Epileptic Bathing

Q: What do you do when an epileptic takes a bath?
A: Throw in your laundry.

City Vampire Bats

Once there was a group of vampire bats that lived in a cave outside of a big city. One night, one said to a another, "I'm so hungry. I'm going to go get something." "No don't! We have to wait for the others!" "I don't care." And off he went. About 30 minutes later, he came back and was covered in blood. The other vampire bat asked, "WHOA!! Where did you find all that blood?" "You really want to see?" asked the bloody one. "Follow me." So the first bat leads the other bat to the city and points to a large black building and asks, "Do you see that building?" "Yes," came the reply. To that the first says, "Well, I didn't."