Sun Lakes

A little old lady was sitting on a park bench in The Sun Lakes, an Arizona Adult community. A man walked over and sits down on the other end of the bench. After a few moments, the woman asks, "Are you a stranger here?"
He replies, "I lived here years ago."
"So, where were you all these years?"
"In prison, he says."
"Why did they put you in prison?"
He looked at her, and very quietly said, "I killed my wife."
"Oh!" said the woman. "So you're single... ?!"

Smith Brothers

The last heir of the Smith Brothers cough drop empire recently died.
There'll be no coffin at his funeral.

Bouncing Baby

A young mother had just given birth to a newborn baby and the nurse was congratulating her when the doctor came in bouncing the baby from hand to hand like a basketball.
"Here's your baby, maam," says the doctor.
The doctor then throws the baby on the floor, hurls it up against the wall, picks it up and twirls it around several times, and then drop kicks it straight out of the 10th floor window.
Totally bewildered, the woman gives out a loud shriek and hollers, "My God!!! What have you done to my baby?!?!!!"
The doctor chuckles a little to himself and says, "April Fools!!! He was already dead!"