Dolly Parton's Kids

Q: How can you find Dolly Parton's kids in a crowd?
A: They're the ones with the stretch marks on their lips.

Back In The Closet

A young gay man calls home and tells his Jewish mother that he has decided to go back into the closet because he has met a wonderful girl and they are going to be married. He tells his mother that he is sure she will be happier since he knows that his gay lifestyle has been very disturbing to her. She responds that she is indeed delighted and asks tentatively, "I suppose it would be too much to hope that she would be Jewish?" He tells her that not only is the girl Jewish, but she’s from a wealthy Beverly Hills family. She admits she is overwhelmed by the news, and asks, "What is her name?" He answers, "Monica Lewinsky." There is a pause, then his mother asks, "What happened to that nice black boy you were dating last year?"

Jovi Love

I met my wife when I was 22. We got married fairly young because she got pregnant. In march of 1985 we had a beautiful baby daughter that my wife wanted to name Love. She was the fruit of our mutual affection and I agreed.
Love grew up hating her name, which greatly upset me and her mother. She was bullied in school every day, something we would have given anything to be able to stop. One day Love came home from school and kissed me on the cheek, something she hadn't done since she was a kid. I heard my wife drive into the driveway and as I went to open the garage door for her I heard a loud bang behind me and I fell on the floor. My wife ran up to me, and as I bled on her arms the only thing I could say was:
Shot through the heart, and you're to blame, baby, you gave love, a bad name.