Election Blues

Q: What's one major problem with the Trump victory?
A: Amy Schumer is reneging on her promise to leave the country.

Bush and Cheney Ordering

Bush and Cheney are at a restaurant for lunch. The waitress comes over and asks what they will be having. Bush says, "I'll have a quickie." The waitress steps back in disgust and says, "Mr. President, I thought that kind of piggish behavior went out with the last administration!" She storms off and Dubya looks confused. Cheney shakes his head at the president and says, "George, it's pronounced QUICHE."

A Question for Bill Clinton

Q: What was Miss Lewinsky's most memorable feature?
A: She has the whitest teeth I've ever come across.