From Another Planet

NO ZAMBODIANS, PLEASE: Judge Rules Out Prince Mongo's Costume
MEMPHIS, Tenn. - A judge has ruled that a defendant can't show up for trial wearing fur, bones, goggles and pale green body paint, even if he is from the planet Zambodia. But an attorney for the man who calls himself Prince Mongo wants to make a federal case out of his client's 10-day jail sentence for contempt of court. Slug PM-Prince Mongo. New, may stand. Federal court hearing starts at 1 p.m. EDT. 

You Know You're Ugly When...

Q: How do you know when you're really ugly?
A: Dogs hump your leg with their eyes closed.

Yo Mama - Don King

Yo mama has such hairy armpits, when she raises her hand people point and yell, "Hey look, it's Don King!"