Business One Liners - Personnel

Cropp's Law: The amount of work done varies inversely with the amount of time spent in the office.
Bo Diddeley's Observation On The Law: Always take a lawyer with you, and bring another lawyer to watch him.
Bolub's Fourth Law of Computerdom: Project teams detest weekly progress reporting because it so vividly manifests their lack of progress.
Deadline-Dan's Demo Demonstration: The higher the "higher-ups" are who've come to see your demo, the lower your chances are of giving a successful one.
Demian's Observation: There is always one item on the screen menu that is mislabeled and should read "Abandon hope all ye who enter here".
DeVries's Dilemma: If you hit two keys on the typewriter, the one you don't want hits the paper.
Dr. Caligari's Comeback: A bad sector disk error occurs only after you've done several hours of work without performing a backup. 

Old Librarians

Old librarians never die, they just get re-shelved

Find Out About The Cat

The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny.
 chauffeur worked for a woman who took her cat with her on rides. During one trip, the driver dropped her at a mall before he gassing up. The cat remained in the car, laying down on the top of the limousine's back seat. The service station's attendant often glanced at unusual passenger. Finally, he asked: "Sir, is that cat someone important?"