Quack, Quack

There was this city doctor who started a practice in the countryside. He once had to go to a farm to attend to a sick farmer who lived there. After a few housecalls he stopped coming to the farm. The puzzled farmer finally phoned him to ask whats the matter, didn't he like him or somethin'. The doctor replied, "No, its your ducks at the entrance... Every time I enter the farm, they insult me!"

Frog On The Head

A man walks into a doctor's office one day with a frog on his head. He sits down and the doctor says, "What's the problem?" The frog says, "Doctor, is there any way you can get this wart off my ass?"

Stop Masturbating

A man went to see his doctor. "You need to stop masturbating," the doctor said. The man asked, "Why?" The doctor replied, "Because I''m trying to examine you!"