Getting Better

Patient: Please tell me, doctor, am I getting better?
Doctor: I think so. But to be sure, let me feel your wallet...

Bee Sting

A woman has just started to play golf when she gets stung on the arm by a bee. She rushes back to the clubhouse, hoping to find a doctor. She asks, "Is anyone here a doctor." One guy, who was pretty drunk, stands up and says, "I'm a doctor, what can I help you with?" "I've been stung by a bee." "Oh really, where?" "Between the first and second hole" "Well, first of all, your stance is too wide..."

Doctor Doctor Collection

• Patient: Doctor, Doctor I’ve lost my memory!
  Doctor: When did this happen?
  Patient: When did what happen?
• Patient: Doctor, Doctor I think I'm a rubber band
  Doctor: Why don't you stretch yourself out on the couch there and tell me all about it!
• Doctor, Doctor everyone thinks I'm a liar I can't believe that!
• Doctor, Doctor I need something to keep my falling hair in, what about a matchbox?
• Patient: Doctor, Doctor I keep seeing double.
  Doctor: Please sit on the couch.
  Patient: Which one?
• Patient: Doctor, Doctor I keep seeing an insect spinning around.
  Doctor: Don't worry, it's just a bug that's going around!
• Patient: Doctor, Doctor I think I'm a moth.. Get out of the way, your in my light!