Organ Jokes

Q: Why are organists like a broken-winded cab horse?
A: They are always longing for another stop.
Q: Why are a organist's fingers like lightning?
A: Because they rarely strike the same place twice.
Q: What do you get if you throw a piano down a mine shaft?
A: A flat miner.
Q: What do you get if you drop an organ on an army base?
A: A flat major.
Q: Why is an 11-foot concert grand better than a studio upright?
A: It makes a louder noise, when you drop it off a cliff.
Q: Why was the organ invented?
A: So the musician would have a place to put his beer.
Q: What does a German Hammond organist do in his life's most tender moments?
A: He puts his Leslie on "slow".

99 Condoms

A guy walks into a local pharmacy and walks up to the counter where a lady pharmacist is filling prescriptions. When she finally gets around to helping him he says, "I'd like 99 condoms please." With a surprised look on her face the pharmacist says, "99 Condoms!? Fuck me!" To which the guy replies, "Make it 100."

Adjust the Chair

A lady goes to the dentist. In the chair, the dentist notices a little brown spot on one of her teeth. "Aha, cavity! I'll have to drill this one out!", says the dentist. "Oh no, I'd rather have a child!!!", cries the lady.  "In that case, I will have to adjust the chair first", replies the dentist.