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Word Play Jokes - Private Parts
A New Priest
A new priest is being given instructions on what to do when he takes confession. The older priest tells the new man, for things like stealing, give 5 hail Mary's, and for sleeping with the neighbors, 10 hail Mary's. So the new priest is taking confession one day. The first man in tells the priest he slept with the woman next door. The priest tells him to do 10 hail Mary's and he's on his way. The next man in, confesses to having a wank behind a bush. Somewhat puzzled, the priest steps out of the confessional box and asks two passing alter boys what the "old man" gives for a wank behind a bush. The two boys reply, "A can of Coke and a Mars Bar."
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Old Lady's House Ransacked
An old lady lived by herself in a small house in a small town. One day she went to the local grocery store and while she was gone a criminal broke into her house, took her clothes off of the line, smashed the watermelons in her garden, shaved her cat and then left when he couldn't find any money. Well, a couple of hours later the old lady got home and when she saw what had happened to her house she immediately called the police. When the officer on the other end answered the phone and asked her what the problem was she simply replied, "yes officer someone broke into my house, took my clothes off, squeezed my melons, and shaved my pussy."
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Identical
Q: What do you call two guys with identical penises?
A: Doppelwangers
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