No Work

Q: What's black and doesn't work?
A: Decaf coffee, you racist bastard!

Potato Chips

Q: What did one potato chip say to the other?
A: Shall we go for a dip?

Comeback Lines!

Man: I know how to please a woman.
Woman: Then please leave me alone.

Man: I want to give myself to you.
Woman: Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.

Man: Your hair color is fabulous.
Woman: Thank you. It's on aisle three at the corner drug store.

Man: You look like a dream.
Woman: Go back to sleep.

Man: I can tell that you want me.
Woman: Yes, I want you to leave.

Man: Hey, baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter. -OR- Stop.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.

Man: What's it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar?
Woman: What's it like being the biggest liar in the world?

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore.