Bitter End

Little Johnny's teacher asked him, "Johnny, give me a sentence using the words, "bitter end" in it. Little Johnny thought for a moment and replies, "Our dog chased our cat and he bitter end."

Pig's Ears

A woman enters a butcher shop and asks the counter assistant, "Do you have pig's ears?" The counter assistant replies, "No, it's just the way my hair is parted!"

Carnival Con

A little boy goes to the carnival and steps up to the "Guess the weight" game. The man at the booth said "If I can write down your exact weight on this piece of paper you have to pay me ten dollars, but if I can't I will pay you ten dollars." The little boy agrees thinking that if the man does guess his weight correctly that he would say he weighed more or less.

Q: In the end the little boy pays the man ten dollars. How did the man win the bet?

A: The man wrote "Your exact weight" on the slip of paper.