Short but Clever

A very small female janitor (4'10", 90 pounds) worked at an amusement park and was asked to go out and sweep up the trash. As she was getting ready to start sweeping, her supervisor noticed her putting rocks in her pockets. When the supervisor asked her what she was doing, she said, "It's very windy out there and sometimes it blows me over. So, now I weigh me down to sweep."

Craig's List

A homeless Native American with a full bladder needs teepee.

Beverly Hills

One day there were four people absent from class. The next day one of the boys came back to school, and the teacher asked where he was. He replied "On top of Beverly Hills." The teacher said "Okay." Then the next day, another boy came in and the teacher asked where were you? He replied "On top of Beverly Hills." The teacher said "Okay." The next day the third boy came in and the teacher asked "Where were you?" and he replied "On top of Beverly Hills". The third person came in and the teacher asked "Where were you?" Before the girl could say anything the teacher said "Let me guess, on top of Beverly Hills?" The girl said "No I am Beverly Hills."