Penguin Car Problems

A penguin was driving his car down the highway when steam began to pour out of the hood. He pulled into a repair shop and asked the mechanic to fix his car. The man said to come back in half an hour. So while he waited the penguin went across the street to the bar, and ordered a glass of milk. Since penguins don't have hands to hold glasses, he spilled some milk on his beak. When he returned to the mechanic, he asked what was wrong with his car. The mechanic said it looked like he blew a seal.

Blonde's Headlights Out

Q: Why did the blonde get pulled over by the police?
A: Her headlights weren't working, so she was flashing people.

Dropping a Bomb

A dentist, a nurse, and an army general are flying. The dentist decides to drop a tooth brush out of the plane. The nurse drops down a medical kit and the army general drops a bomb. They land the airplane and see what happened... First they found a guy looking for his false teeth. Next they found a guy bandaging his wounds. Lastly they found a young boy laughing his head off. They asked him what happened and he said, "My grandfather farted and blew up his house."