Top Ten Least Popular Stephen King Novels

10. "The Man Who Died of Old Age"
9. "How Cujo Got His Groove Back"
8. "Here's Another One I Cranked Out In An Afternoon"
7. "Vacuum-Starter"
6. "The Scary Windowless Corridor Next To The Oval Office"
5. "The Guy Who Accidentally Put Expired Milk In His Coffee --He Didn't Drink It, But What If He Had?"
4. "The Scariest Part of This Book Is My Picture On The Back Cover"
3. "Inside the Kitchen At Your Local T.G.I. Friday's"
2. "Hi I'm Your New Neighbor, Richard Simmons"
1. "Satan's Independent Prosecutor"

New Year's Resolutions

Are you sick of making the same resolutions year after year and yet you never keep them? Here are some resolutions that you can actually accomplish! Enjoy!
10. Read less.
9. I want to gain weight. Put on at least 30 pounds.
8. Stop exercising. Waste of time.
7. Watch more TV. I've been missing some good stuff.
6. Procrastinate more.
5. Drink. Drink some more.
4. Start being superstitious.
3. Spend more time at work.
2. Stop bringing lunch from home: I should eat out more.
and last but not least...1. Take up a new habit: maybe smoking!

Top 10 Reasons To Live In Quebec

1. Everybody assumes you're an asshole
2. Racism is socially acceptable
3. The only province to ever kidnap federal politicians
4. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbor will move out next
5. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada
6. The FLQ
7. Your hockey team is made up entirely of dirty French guys
8. The province with the oldest, nastiest hookers
9. NON-smokers are the outcasts
10. You can blame all your problems on the ''Anglo bastards''