You'll Never Hear a Man Say...

Things You'll Never Hear A Man Say:

• Here honey, you use the remote.
• You know, I'd like to see her again, but her breasts are just too big.
• Ooh, Antonio Banderas AND Brad Pitt? That's one movie I gotta see!
• While I'm up, can I get you anything?
• Honey since we don't have anything else planned, will you go to the wallpaper store with me?
• Why don't you go to the mall with me and help me pick out a pair of shoes?
• Aww, forget Monday night football, let's watch Melrose Place.
• Hey let me hold your purse while you try that on.
• We never talk anymore.

If Radio Shack Made Toasters...

If Radio Shack made toasters, the staff would sell you a toaster, but not know anything about it. You would be able to buy all the parts to build your own toaster.

Boomerang

ME: I'd like to return a defective boomerang
SHOPKEEPER: Ok. Where is it?
ME: I have no idea