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Sexist Jokes - About Men
Men And Parking Spots
Q: How are men and parking spots alike?
A: Good ones are always taken. Free ones are mostly handicapped or extremely small.
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What Women Would Do if They Had a Penis for a Day
10. Get ahead faster in corporate America.
9. Get a blow job.
8. Find out what is so fascinating about beating the meat.
7. Pee standing up while talking to other men at a urinal.
6. Determine WHY you can't hit the bowl consistently.
5. Find out what it's like to be on the other end of a surging orgasm.
4. Touch yourself in public without thought as to how improper it may seem.
3. Jump up and down naked with an erection to see if it feels as funny as it looks.
2. Understand the scientific reason for the light refraction which occurs between a man's eyes and the ruler situated next to his member which causes two inches to be added to the final measurement.
1. Repeat number 9......
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40 Years of Sex Life
It seems that when God was making the world, he called man over and bestowed upon him twenty years of normal sex life. Man was horrified. "Only twenty years of normal sex life?" But the Lord was very adamant that was all man could have. Then the Lord called the monkey and gave him twenty years. "But I don't need twenty years", he protested. "Ten is plenty for me." Man spoke up eagerly, "Can I have the other ten?". The monkey graciously agreed.
Then the Lord called the lion and gave him twenty years and the lion, like the monkey, wanted only ten. Again the man spoke up, "Can I have the other ten?" The lion said of course he could. Then came the donkey and he was given twenty years. But like the others, ten was sufficient and again man pleaded, "Can I have the other ten?".
This explains why man has twenty years of normal sex life, plus ten years of monkeying around, ten years of lion about it, and ten years of making an ass of himself.
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