A Man's World

This could be considered THE ideal world for many men:

• His son on the cover of a box of Wheaties.
• His mistress in the centerfold of Playboy.
• A picture of his wife on the milk carton.

Dogs and Men

How Dogs and Men Are the Same :
1. Both take up too much space on the bed.
2. Both have irrational fears about vacuum cleaning.
3. Both mark their territory.
4. Neither tells you what's bothering them.
5. The smaller ones tend to be more nervous.
6. Both have an inordinate fascination with women's crotches.
7. Neither does any dishes.
8. Both fart shamelessly.
9. Neither of them notice when you get your hair cut.
10. Both like dominance games.
11. Both are suspicious of the postman.
12. Neither understands what you see in cats.

Men And Mad Cow Disease

A woman asks: "Why don't men get mad cow disease?" Another woman replies: "Because men are pigs!"