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Sexist Jokes - About Women
Grounds for Divorce
A woman goes into her lawyers office requesting a divorce. He is taking all of her background information and asks her, "Do you have grounds for a divorce?" To which she replies, "Well, we have three acres." "No, ma'am. What I mean is, does he beat you up?" asks the attorney. "No, I get up around 6:30 and he sleeps until 7:00," she responds. Feeling a little frustrated the attorney asks, "Lady, tell me, do you have a grudge?" Looking very confident she states, "No, we have a carport." At this point the lawyer has lost his patience and asks, "Look, Lady. Why the heck do you want a divorce?" "Because he can't hold an intelligent conversation!"
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Don't Be Sexist...
Don't be sexist... broads hate that!
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The Missing Toupee!
On a senior citizen bus tour, the driver was surprised. While the passengers were unloading to do some sightseeing, one elderly lady stopped and whispered in his ear, "Driver, I believe that I was sexually harassed!" The driver didn't think much of this complaint, but promised he would check into it soon. Later, that very same day, as the passengers were unloading again, a second little old lady bent down and whispered in his ear, "Sir, I believe I was sexually harassed!" This time, he knew it had to be taken care of soon. A few passengers had remained on the bus, and he decided to go back and question them, to see if they had any knowledge of what was going on. He found one little old man crawling along the bus floor underneath the seats and stooped down to question him. "Excuse me, sir, can I help you?" The elderly man looked up and said, "Well, sonny, you sure can. I've lost my toupee and I'm trying to find it. I thought I'd found it twice, but they were both parted in the middle...and mine's parted on the side!"
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