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Sex Jokes - Rape Jokes
Valentine Drinks
As I looked into her eyes I felt my knees go weak and my stomach turned to butterflies.
That's when I realized I'd drugged the wrong glass.
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Hitchhiking Through The South
A long-haired youth was hitchhiking through the deep South. He got a ride from a mean looking redneck trucker. After riding about 30 miles in silence, the youth finally said, "Well, aren't you going to ask me?" "Ask you what?" replied the trucker. "If I'm a boy or a girl," answered the youth. "Don't matter," replied the trucker. "Gonna fuck ya anyway."
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Buzz Buzz Buzz
A man and a woman have just finished having sex when suddenly a bee flies in the bedroom window and zooms straight up the woman's love tunnel. "Oh God!" she screams. "Help me! There's a bee up my vagina and it's buzzing around in there (albeit rather pleasurably)!"
"Let's go says her boyfriend. I'll rush you straight to hospital."
On arrival at the emergency room, the agitated couple are ushered into a curtained-off area by a male doctor. "What seems to be the problem?" he asks.
"I've got a freaking bee up my vagina," screams the woman. "Get it out!"
"I see," says the doctor. "Well, there's only one way to extract this bee. I'm going to have to spread honey on my penis and entice it out."
The doctor gets out his old fella and dunks it in a jar of honey he just happens to have with him. He then mounts the woman and penetrates her with his sticky sweet love stick. "Just an inch or two should do it," he says.
After a few seconds he slides it in a bit further. After another few seconds he says, "Hmmm, it doesn't seem to be biting. I'll have to go deeper," and slides it in all the way.
Suddenly he starts fondling her boobs with his hands, thrusting violently with his hips and moaning with what sounds like pleasure.
"HOLD IT!" says the boyfriend. "What are you doing?"
"Change of plans!" shouts the doctor. "I've decided to drown the little bastard!"
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