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Sex Jokes - Oral Sex Jokes
Good Blow Jobs
Q: How do you know who gives good blow jobs?
A: Word of mouth.
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Patenting A Peach
A farmer goes to the patent office to patent a peach, and the patent officer says "you can't patent a peach, the peach has already been patented!" And the farmer says,
"Oh no. Not THIS kind of peach. Go ahead, try it!" So the patent officer takes a bite, and says
"oh, wow! This is so good! It tastes like- blackberry pie!" And the farmer says
"Yeah, and Do you like vanilla ice cream? Well then you gotta flip it over & try the other side". So the patent officer does and he's like
"Man! that really does taste like vanilla ice cream! I can't believe it!" So then the farmer looks around a bit and lowers his voice almost to a whisper, and says:
"Psst! Have you ever tasted pussy?"
"Oh yeah, I've eaten plenty of pussy!"
"And you like it, right?"
"Yeah I LOVE the taste of pussy" says the patent officer, starting to get excited.The farmer says,
"OK, then take a bite, right there" So the patent officer takes this HUGE bite, and then his eyes widen & he spits it out all over the place.
"Oh, Yuck! That tasted like SHIT!" & the farmer says
"shoot,...I'm sorry- flip it over & try the other side!"
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Monica Testifying
Q: How did we know that Monica would testify?
A: Because she has a history of not being able to keep her mouth closed.
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