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Two Hours
Did you hear about the fellow that was talking to his buddy, when he said, "I don't know what to get my wife for her birthday. She has everything, and besides, she can afford to buy anything she wants. So, I'm stumped." His buddy said, "I have an idea. Why don't you make up a certificate that says she can have two hours of great sex, any way she wants it. She'll probably be thrilled!" So the first fella did just that. The next day his buddy asked, "Well, did you take my suggestion? How did it turn out?" "She loved it. She jumped up, thanked me, kissed me on the mouth, and ran out the door yelling, 'I'll see you in two hours'."
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Lesbian Visits a Whore House
A popular whore house was visited by a lesbian. The lesbian requested a 15 year old, and the madam replied, "I'm sorry, we don't serve minors to lickers."
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Check The Buffet
In a Texas bar, the bartender Fred was fed up with penis boasting from the regulars. So to put an end to all the boasting Fred says to them "whip 'em out". Fred pulls a yard stick from under the bar, at the same time a gay guy walks into the bar. Fred ask the man if there is something that he can get for him. The gay guy replies "I was going to get a beer, but I'll check your buffet first."
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