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Sex Jokes
No Scream in Space
They say in space, no one can hear you scream. That's because they've never done it with me.
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Viagra again.
Questions to Ponder about Viagra:
If a man overdoses on Viagra, how do they get the casket lid shut?
If the insurance companies are going to set guidelines before approving Viagra coverage, what are they going to use? A growth chart?
I dropped a Viagra in a jar of small sweet pickles last night and this morning had a jar full of big Kosher dills.
I would only take Viagra for intellectual purposes, so my head would swell.
Before Viagra, for some people, making love was classified as "assault with a dead weapon."
Viagra, medicine's version of "MIRACLE-GRO."
Mix Viagra and Prozac and you have a guy who is ready to go, but doesn't really care where.
Are you taking Viagra or are you just happy to see me?
If however you do need to take Viagra, remember to swallow them quickly otherwise you'll get a stiff neck.
A shipment of Viagra was highjacked today. Police have put out an All-Points bulletin: Be on the lookout for two hardened criminals! They will face a stiff sentence when convicted and they'll surely be sent to a Penal Institution.
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A Muppet's Mess
One day Kermit the Frog was looking sad. Fozzie Bear went up to him and asked what was wrong. Kermit said, "I'm having problems with Miss Piggy." "Like what?" asked Fozzie. "Well, Piggy wants me to eat her out and I can't." Fozzie asked, "So, what's wrong with that? You're not a prude or anything." "No," sighed Kermit, "but I am a Jew."
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