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Sex Jokes
Sex Stats
A marketing manager boards a flight and is lucky enough to be seated next to an absolutely gorgeous woman. They exchange hellos and he notices she's reading a report about sex. He asks her about it and she replies, "It's an interesting report loaded with sexual statistics. It points out that American Indians have the longest average penis and Polish men have the biggest diameter. By the way my name is Jill. What's yours?" He coolly replies, "Tonto, Tonto Kawalski, nice to meet you."
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Classmates
Sue and Sally meet at their 30th class reunion, and they haven't seen each other since graduation. They begin to talk and bring each other up to date. The conversation covers their husbands, their children, homes, etc., and finally gets around to their sex lives. Sue says, "It's OK. We get it on every week or so, but it's no big adventure; how's yours?" Sally replies, "It's just great, ever since we got into S&M." Sue is aghast. "Really, Sally, I never would have quessed that you would go for that!!" Oh, sure," says Sally, "He Snores while I Masturbate."
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Sandals From A Pakistani
This married couple was on holiday in Pakistan. They were touring around the marketplace looking at the goods and such, when they passed this small sandal shop. From inside they heard a gentleman with a Pakistani accent say, "You, foreigners! Come in. Come into my humble shop." So the married couple walked in. The Pakistani man said to them, "I have some special sandals I think you'd be interested in. They make you wild at sex like a great desert camel." Well, the wife was really interested in buying the sandals after what the man had claimed, but her husband felt he really didn't need them, being the sex god he was. The husband asked the man, "How could sandals make you into a sex freak?" The Pakistani man replied, "Just try them on." Well, the husband, after much badgering from his wife, finally conceded to try them on. As soon as he slipped them onto his feet, he got this wild look in his eyes; something his wife hadn't seen in many years --- raw sexual power. In a blink of an eye, the husband rushed the Pakistani man, threw him on a table and started tearing at the guy's pants. All the time the Pakistani man was screaming, "YOU HAVE THEM ON THE WRONG FEET!"
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