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Sex Jokes
That's Happiness
The friends of the bride decided to give the newlyweds a tape recording of the couple making love on their honeymoon night as a gag wedding gift. They accomplished this by hiding a tape recording under the newlywed's bed that evening. Before they gave the recorded tape to her, they played the tape and heard her moaning to her new husband, "That's happiness! That's happiness!" But her voice sounded funny and they discovered that they were playing the tape at the wrong speed. When they slowed the tape down to the correct pitch, they were surprised to hear her shouting at him, "That's a penis?! That's a penis?!"
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Gay Chinese Man
Q: What does a gay Chinese guy do to his boyfriend?
A: Green-teabag him.
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Hitting Bottom
Two men sitting beside one another at a bar. The 1st man is an average size guy weighing about 170lbs. The 2nd man is a huge fat guy weighing about 375lbs. The 2nd guy asks the 1st guy. "When you have sex with a woman, do you always hit bottom?" The 1st guy replies, "It depends on the woman, how about you?" The 2nd guy replies, "I always hit bottom, no matter who I'm with." "Of course you can't help but to hit bottom when you "MASH IT FLAT."
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