Everything We Need

A young teacher was trying to teach her six-year-old's about sharing. In the midst of doing so, she said that no one had everything they wanted. At this point, a young arm was energetically pumping at the back of the class. She tried to ignore him, but little Johnny started saying, "oh miss, oh miss!" with his arm pumping. "Yes, Johnny, what is it?" she asked, trying to remain calm. Little Johnny stood up and proclaimed to the class, "at our house, we have everything." "Don't be silly," the teacher replied, "not even the richest man has everything." "We do," he answered, "My daddy said so the other day." "Now, why would your father say such a thing?" she asked. "Well, my fifteen year old sister came home with her skinhead boyfriend, and told poppa she was pregnant. That's when my dad said "God, that's all we needed."

Girl's School

The biology teacher at the all-girls academy was handing back a test on the male anatomy. "I don't understand why you girls can't understand the male sex organ. You've had it pounded into you all semester!"

Discovering America

A Geography teacher stands in front of a map of the world.
Geography Teacher: Tony, can you tell me where in the world America is placed on this map?
Tony shows him America.
Geography Teacher: Now, Lisa, can you tell me the name of the guy who discovered America?
Lisa: Tony did!!