The Chase

A guy was driving his car at 80 mph when he saw the flashing red and blue lights. Thinking that the cop might not be able to catch him, he accelerated to 110 mph.
He finally came to some sense and pulled over to the side. The cop stepped out, took his license and examined it without a word. He looked at the driver and said, "I've had a tough shift and this is my last pullover. I don't feel like doing anymore paperwork so if you can give me an excuse for your driving that I haven't heard before, you can go!"
The driver blinked only once while his brain scramble for a reply. "Last week my wife ran off with a cop, " he said, " and I was afraid you were trying to give her back!"
"Off you go," said the officer.

Locked in the Trunk

The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny.
Monday, December 7, 1992 Joe Albert Ruiz, 19, was arrested in Santa Maria in September. Police said he had broken into a car in the middle of the night and was in the trunk, disconnecting the rear speakers, when the trunk closed and locked him in. Neighbors reported strange noises, and a police officer called to the scene heard Ruiz banging on the trunk and yelling, "Let me out!" 

Rookie

A rookie police officer was out for his first ride in a cruiser with an experienced partner. A call came in telling them to disperse some people who were loitering. The officers drove to the street and observed a small crowd standing on a corner.
The rookie rolled down his window and said, "Let's get off the corner people."
A few glances, but no one moved, so he barked again, "Let's get off that corner... NOW!" Intimidated, the group of people began to leave, casting puzzled stares in his direction. Proud of his first official act, the young policeman turned to his partner and asked, "Well, how did I do?"
"Pretty good," chuckled the vet, "especially since this is a bus stop."