Committing Adultery

Joe enters the confessional and tells the priest that he has committed adultery. "Oh, no," said the priest, thinking of the most promiscuous women in town. "Was it with Marie Brown?" "I'd rather not say who it was." "Was it with Betty Smith?" "I'd rather not say," says Joe. So the priest gives him absolution and Joe leaves. While leaving the church, Joe's friend asks if he received absolution. "Yes, and two very good leads!"

Asian JW

Q: What do you call Jehova's Witnesses in Chinese
A: Ding Dong

Lesson In Liars

A Sunday school teacher was giving her class the assignment for the next week. "Next Sunday," she said, "we are going to talk about liars, and in preparation for the lesson, I want you all to read the Seventeenth Chapter of Mark." The following week at the beginning of the class, the teacher said, "Now all who have prepared for today's lesson by reading the Seventeenth Chapter of Mark, please come to the front." Half the class stood up and came forward. "The rest of you may leave," said the teacher, "these students are the ones I want to talk speak to. There is no Seventeenth Chapter in the Book of Mark!"