Free Water

Two Jews walk into a bar and ask for some water. Why? Because its free.

Mohel Retirement

A mohel, after 20 years in the business, decides to retire. He thinks that maybe now he could use the foreskins for something. He brings all of them to a leather worker, and asks him to make something out of all the foreskins. He says, "Sure, come back in two weeks, I'll make something special." Two weeks later, the mohel returns. The leather maker presents him a gorgeous wallet. The mohel looks at it and asks, "It's a wonderful wallet, but that's all that you could get from the thousands of foreskins? It's so tiny." The leather maker responded, "Watch when you rub it, it turns into a suitcase."

Jewish American Princess

Q: Why does a Jewish American Princess close her eyes during sex?
A: She can't stand it to see her husband enjoy himself.