IRS Agents Into Heaven

Two income tax collectors died and arrived at the pearly gates. Just ahead of them were two clergy, but St. Peter motioned them aside and took the internal revenue into heaven at once. "Why them ahead of us?" the surprised religious leaders asked. "Haven't we done everything possible to spread the good word?" "Yes," said St. Peter, "but those two IRS agents scared the Heck out of more people than you ever did!"

Heaven's Quiz

Heaven was getting a bit crowded, so Peter began giving quizzes to see who should get in. A man ascended to heaven, and came to the gates. "Who was the first man?" asked Peter. "Adam." "That's correct. Enter." Soon another man came along. "Where did Adam and Eve live?" "Eden." That's correct. Enter." Then Mother Theresa came along. "Ooh, I'll have to give you a hard one. What did Eve say when she met Adam for the first time?" "Mmm, that IS a hard one." "Enter."

Lawyer to Heaven

Q: Why'd the lawyer go to Heaven?
A: Hell was full.